Part 1 ♫ There was a bamboo tree, And the bamboo tree was not me, They cut the tree and called it grass, Still the grass was not me, They tried to roll the grass into a paper, The rolled paper was not me, They lit the paper and took the smoke, Smoke was not me, Smoke hit my head, The poem was me!!
Part 2. ♫ “Pick your bottles and run to the fete!!!”,
i said pick your bottles and run to the fete..
tell the girls that i am a creep,
Steal the love and hang out with the beast..
pick your bottle and run to the fete..
rest your bum and sit on a seat,
listen to the guitar and the drum beats..
pick your bottle and run to the fete..
kill a lover, and send me the pics,
shed a tear as the clock ticks,
pick a bottle and run to a funeral,
the general is burying his only daughter..
play the carol, play the old act, la la la la la la la la
pick your bottle, hick, hick, and run to the ,,,DAMN !!!
Friday, December 26, 2008
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Hallucinogenic
Two roads?? there were more than two roads i guess when it all started, and i had to choose one of them, and so i did.
After travelling a while, i realized it was not healing the wounds and the destination was far out of sight.
Besides, people always advise, i mean your well wishers always advise to pick the path that will lead you to your destination where you can find yourself. The road that leads you to your destiny. Where happines awaits you with arms wide open.
well, everyday i get up and everday it is something new. The mirror is hallucinating. now why blame the mirror !! ( i should probably clean it more often) everyday i thought ,,maybe,,probably,,,maybe..!! The face is the same, but the reflection in the mirror keeps changing.
and so i went back all the way, back to the crossroad, and started walking on a new road.
Sadly, there was nothing like "the road not taken" or "the road less travelled" for me. It looked all the same. It still does.
Everything is hallucinogenic. Mystic.
A moment passes by and i feel i have found myself. The realization dies when another moment happens to pass by.
So, am i to blame myself for the confusion? for the hallucination? (lets avoid these questions, because you can't really blame yourself for the fault of others. Now can ya ? I tried doing it, and it did answer a few questions, but the restlessness never went, coz you know deep inside, it was never you in the first place)
These irrational thoughts and these obscure feelings...its like i am constantly drugged. On a constant high!!
i enjoy this feeling of uncertainity. Atleast i am not cheating myself. Trying to create these fictitious walls around me, faking my own identity. Making my ground and pushing others over the dge.
I am happy that i don't live in guilt. Sadly, i can sense nothing but gulit all around me. Perfect people with their deceptive faces.
And i don't have to pay for their sins. And if i travel and the road leads me to a place where i don't want to be, i might as well walk all the way back to the crossroad and chose a new road.
A little more vigilance may pay well in the longer run though.
After travelling a while, i realized it was not healing the wounds and the destination was far out of sight.
Besides, people always advise, i mean your well wishers always advise to pick the path that will lead you to your destination where you can find yourself. The road that leads you to your destiny. Where happines awaits you with arms wide open.
well, everyday i get up and everday it is something new. The mirror is hallucinating. now why blame the mirror !! ( i should probably clean it more often) everyday i thought ,,maybe,,probably,,,maybe..!! The face is the same, but the reflection in the mirror keeps changing.
and so i went back all the way, back to the crossroad, and started walking on a new road.
Sadly, there was nothing like "the road not taken" or "the road less travelled" for me. It looked all the same. It still does.
Everything is hallucinogenic. Mystic.
A moment passes by and i feel i have found myself. The realization dies when another moment happens to pass by.
So, am i to blame myself for the confusion? for the hallucination? (lets avoid these questions, because you can't really blame yourself for the fault of others. Now can ya ? I tried doing it, and it did answer a few questions, but the restlessness never went, coz you know deep inside, it was never you in the first place)
These irrational thoughts and these obscure feelings...its like i am constantly drugged. On a constant high!!
i enjoy this feeling of uncertainity. Atleast i am not cheating myself. Trying to create these fictitious walls around me, faking my own identity. Making my ground and pushing others over the dge.
I am happy that i don't live in guilt. Sadly, i can sense nothing but gulit all around me. Perfect people with their deceptive faces.
And i don't have to pay for their sins. And if i travel and the road leads me to a place where i don't want to be, i might as well walk all the way back to the crossroad and chose a new road.
A little more vigilance may pay well in the longer run though.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
RIP
Staring at 42.
42 messages. 42 conversations. 42 stories. 42 puzzles. Each different and yet same. Each same and yet different.
42 it is.
42: " Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything." - The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. 42 Questions to all the answers of life - me!!
A single click of mouse and everything gets deleted from the RAM of my life. My brain caching all that it can, probably to reminisce these 42 if ever i plan to walk that line again in ma mind.
Probably a revisit before i direct the 42 to the trash and remove it from the trash permanently. Probably not.
42 lies embracing a single truth? Or a wrong dimension. A delusion!!!
Staring.
42 messages. 42 conversations. 42 stories. 42 puzzles. Each different and yet same. Each same and yet different.
42 it is.
42: " Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything." - The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. 42 Questions to all the answers of life - me!!
A single click of mouse and everything gets deleted from the RAM of my life. My brain caching all that it can, probably to reminisce these 42 if ever i plan to walk that line again in ma mind.
Probably a revisit before i direct the 42 to the trash and remove it from the trash permanently. Probably not.
42 lies embracing a single truth? Or a wrong dimension. A delusion!!!
Staring.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Escape
"A path to innovation and a path to destruction, bound by the same chains of human limitations."
Limitations of need, desire, happiness, pain, suffering and existence.
Who defines these limitations? Who defines the right and the wrong? The good from the bad, the true from the false, the YOU from the ME.
We all make mistakes. That's how we have been crafted and made. To err, to fall, to suffer. We all, at some point of time in our lives have woken up at nights due to bad dreams. Dreams - They reflect the conscience in a peculiar manner that often goes unnoticed.
We have lied and we have cheated. We have broken a few hearts and we have been heart broken. We have betrayed and tasted the bitter experience when someone doesn't live up to our expectations. We have broken a few promises too. We have laughed and we have cried. Sometimes the smiles and tears have gone unnoticed. The cycle of life takes us to myriad places, eventhough we haven't moved an inch. We have been blamed and have taken the blames also. We have been the transmitter and we have been the receiver.
And yet,
We all have risen from the ashes, to condemn our actions of the past, to correct our mistakes, to fly again, to search for happiness and to mince the pain. The path we choose undermines who we are. The path that differentiates the YOU from the ME.
Mortal lives, Immortal thoughts.
And before the words get entangled and before you shun this as "OBSCURE"!
In a nutshell, your inner happiness and the path you follow differentiates the right from the wrong, the good from the bad and the YOU from the ME.
You may hurt a thousand people and you may betray a thousand more. But, never cheat yourself and more importantly never cheat your heart. "Ironically, it's harder to forgive self than to forgive others."
Learn to know what you want. Learn to read what you desire. Learn to mark the path that will make you a hero or a villain.
Moments in life can be weird, ruthless, funny and generous. Often, the greatest kings, the scientists, the accomplishers have been all alone, especially when they needed to share their happiness and success.
So in this pursuit for happiness, play well. Choose your path well.
Remember, Life is what we want it to be. "WE"
Empathy and Sympathy are two faces of the same coin. You may get through as a winner at the end of the day and you may look back and absolve your past based on your present. Your state of mind will always determine how you look back at the past. Your success is as relative as everything else in this life. It is as relative as our existence. It will either comprehend your happiness or increase the hurting. A single moment of truth, a moment of realization is enough to break a million fake smiles and a hollow world that you portray to the world. Stay clear. Choose your path well.
And in the end, the only one who will be answerable to our actions, our choices, our decisions is "US". The sooner we realize this, the sooner we can escape.
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
The Hermit Crab
“You have started working like an ASS!!” – Sita, Ritika
“kya hogaya hai tujhe, kya tha, kya ban gaya hai” – Harsha
“Bhai, Itni raat ko bhi office mein” Dhanno Bhai
“tujhe subah 7 baje ghar se nikalte hue dekhta hun and raat ko 11 baje wapas aate hue, bas that’s all I have known u since the past one month” – New roomie (A Bong, yet again, but not even .1% cool as my ex roomie, Joy A.K.A Saikat (yes, saikat is a name))
I usually ignore such statements and simply choose to address myself as a workaholic. So yesterday while walking back to my house (I choose to call it a house and not a home), karaoke’ing some nice classic rock songs, I felt schizoid. I know it’s nothing to be proud of.
“Connected to the world through so many means and yet in a way disconnected.”
Feeling Schizoid.
I have let myself go.
I think the time is not right, but I will hang on,
I will fight it out; I will hold the line.
Enjoying the solitude, the space that I have created for myself;
I am by my own, the demons giving me some company;
Yet, the day is really long; the night sometimes refuses to pass by;
But like everybody, sometimes, in pursuit..
The hurt hasn’t gone, though the tears have dried away,
Shattered dreams, I face whatever is coming my way
Sometimes, I need a helping hand;
A shoulder to rest on, a tender kiss, a warm touch to make the tiredness run away, and I look at myself,
I feel that sometimes, maybe sometimes..
Reminiscing old friends, the lost smile, that serene touch;
Those improbable moments, improbable wishes;
And now there are desires, mutated and cloned; wishing someone may undo it all;
In search; maybe sometimes..
All I had back then was my world
All I languish for is my own world.
“kya hogaya hai tujhe, kya tha, kya ban gaya hai” – Harsha
“Bhai, Itni raat ko bhi office mein” Dhanno Bhai
“tujhe subah 7 baje ghar se nikalte hue dekhta hun and raat ko 11 baje wapas aate hue, bas that’s all I have known u since the past one month” – New roomie (A Bong, yet again, but not even .1% cool as my ex roomie, Joy A.K.A Saikat (yes, saikat is a name))
I usually ignore such statements and simply choose to address myself as a workaholic. So yesterday while walking back to my house (I choose to call it a house and not a home), karaoke’ing some nice classic rock songs, I felt schizoid. I know it’s nothing to be proud of.
“Connected to the world through so many means and yet in a way disconnected.”
Feeling Schizoid.
I have let myself go.
I think the time is not right, but I will hang on,
I will fight it out; I will hold the line.
Enjoying the solitude, the space that I have created for myself;
I am by my own, the demons giving me some company;
Yet, the day is really long; the night sometimes refuses to pass by;
But like everybody, sometimes, in pursuit..
The hurt hasn’t gone, though the tears have dried away,
Shattered dreams, I face whatever is coming my way
Sometimes, I need a helping hand;
A shoulder to rest on, a tender kiss, a warm touch to make the tiredness run away, and I look at myself,
I feel that sometimes, maybe sometimes..
Reminiscing old friends, the lost smile, that serene touch;
Those improbable moments, improbable wishes;
And now there are desires, mutated and cloned; wishing someone may undo it all;
In search; maybe sometimes..
All I had back then was my world
All I languish for is my own world.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
The H93 Way !!!
Hey satya, CTRL c + CTRL V'ing the post from your blogsite, without your permission. I thought i would correct all the spelling mistakes and other errors,,,but then i realised, you wrote this when we all were drunk like a skunk!! (did we manage to get up before 3 PM next day??))
Sue me if you want to. Like i care!! :P
H 93
H 93 is a place i find myself lonely,
It's a place i have been amongst company,
It's a place where i have tried my best for my dreams,
It's a place where this story begins.
It's a story of seven guys,
One is a super cool guy called Anant,
The man himself is duly loved by the opposite sex,
Yet he is lonely for the real one.
The 2nd guy is Kundan,
Who is perhaps the most introvert,Y
ou have to see him when he is drunk one night,
Yet you would see him completely sober the next day.
The 3rd guy is Mishra,
The child of all the flat,
The guy who brought all the flat to smiles,
He is the best in lighting cigarettes and yet he doesn't smoke.
The 4th guy is Dhanno,
The guy who is super serious,
Yet he wears Super man T shirt.
And I miss him because he was a pure joy when completely drunk.
The 5th Guy is Harsha,
The guy who wakes up till 7 am.
Yet he is fresh enough to attend the office next day at 2 pm,
He is a great guy.
The two new guys r Ritesh and Deo,
Deo laughs so loudly he doesnt need a loudspeaker,
Ritesh is a cute guy who is very innocent,
Both Deo and ritesh would make kundan and mishra very happy.(PUN INTENDED),,
The 7th Guy is Saumil,
He is full of dreams,
and yet is a daysleeper,
a budding entrepreneur,
he is a hopeless victim of love
Still manages to carry the innocence of a child,
Abt me,
I am just a journey man,
I sign off by signing,
H 93 rocks.
- Satya
Sue me if you want to. Like i care!! :P
H 93
H 93 is a place i find myself lonely,
It's a place i have been amongst company,
It's a place where i have tried my best for my dreams,
It's a place where this story begins.
It's a story of seven guys,
One is a super cool guy called Anant,
The man himself is duly loved by the opposite sex,
Yet he is lonely for the real one.
The 2nd guy is Kundan,
Who is perhaps the most introvert,Y
ou have to see him when he is drunk one night,
Yet you would see him completely sober the next day.
The 3rd guy is Mishra,
The child of all the flat,
The guy who brought all the flat to smiles,
He is the best in lighting cigarettes and yet he doesn't smoke.
The 4th guy is Dhanno,
The guy who is super serious,
Yet he wears Super man T shirt.
And I miss him because he was a pure joy when completely drunk.
The 5th Guy is Harsha,
The guy who wakes up till 7 am.
Yet he is fresh enough to attend the office next day at 2 pm,
He is a great guy.
The two new guys r Ritesh and Deo,
Deo laughs so loudly he doesnt need a loudspeaker,
Ritesh is a cute guy who is very innocent,
Both Deo and ritesh would make kundan and mishra very happy.(PUN INTENDED),,
The 7th Guy is Saumil,
He is full of dreams,
and yet is a daysleeper,
a budding entrepreneur,
he is a hopeless victim of love
Still manages to carry the innocence of a child,
Abt me,
I am just a journey man,
I sign off by signing,
H 93 rocks.
- Satya
Sunday, July 6, 2008
RACE!!!!
go 14 back,
Standing at the back,
unnoticed in the eyes of people,
Growing up was so easy, i loved the lil kid in me.
i didn't try to undesrtand me, nobody tried to understand me..
that night was a dream.
go 10 back..
new in the race and eager to plant ma feet...
life was a report card and a 100m race..
my collection of comics and a few lovely face.
rock, roses and serendipity..
That night was a dream..
Rewind..
go 2' back
running for a job and running for a degree..
clicking loads of snaps..making P.R.O.M.I.S.E.S...
it was difficult to leave..and that night was yet a dream..
go 1 back..
running high on cash, running on sweet success and life's irony..
a few steps back lost ma frens, love and so many memories..
Now,
sitting in the front,
high and intoxicated...
a thousand eyes..
growing up is so difficult, i hate the devil in me..
complicated life and a complicated me..
Tonight..there ain't no dream....
Standing at the back,
unnoticed in the eyes of people,
Growing up was so easy, i loved the lil kid in me.
i didn't try to undesrtand me, nobody tried to understand me..
that night was a dream.
go 10 back..
new in the race and eager to plant ma feet...
life was a report card and a 100m race..
my collection of comics and a few lovely face.
rock, roses and serendipity..
That night was a dream..
Rewind..
go 2' back
running for a job and running for a degree..
clicking loads of snaps..making P.R.O.M.I.S.E.S...
it was difficult to leave..and that night was yet a dream..
go 1 back..
running high on cash, running on sweet success and life's irony..
a few steps back lost ma frens, love and so many memories..
Now,
sitting in the front,
high and intoxicated...
a thousand eyes..
growing up is so difficult, i hate the devil in me..
complicated life and a complicated me..
Tonight..there ain't no dream....
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
RAIN --- Rejuvenate ; RAIN --- Dig in Sorrow
RAIN …The noise, the smell, the scene....
Sitting next to the windows and staring at the rain, Mr buddy is lost as usual in his own world,,
The sand stretches as far as he can see..and nothing else is visible...
An eagle in the blue sky with its wings spread..Mr. Buddy doesn't feel the same..
A snail trying to reach the shore, waiting for the water to carry it back to the ocean..Mr. Buddy is confused...
A kid waiting for his dad to come and pick him up from school...its been quite some time since the last bell rang..Mr. Buddy >> WHAT?? now where is this heading..
A soldier stranded in the enemy territory, wounded..with hopes zeroing down..and with nothing else but memories to keep him company ..Mr. Buddy says >> No Comments..
It starts raining heavily now..A real heavy downpour!!
Don't really know the exact word for the situation..but Mr Buddy can feel some pulses pass through him..right from his toe to his head..He is fighting the urge inside him, a part in him dragging him out ..out of his home to the rain outside..and a part inside him stopping him and asking him to continue with his random thoughts( day dreaming..) and telling him that he shud keep away from the rain..
for a moment he gets up, and in the very next moment he is relaxing back in the bed staring at the drops of rain as they fall on the earth..
Rain drops >>THOSE LITTLE PEARLS >> they look beautiful, each one falling from the clouds, through the sky, creating ripples and music as they fall on this thirsty earth..
the music they create is sweet to some ears and pain and agony to the others..its good time's for some, a time that promises a good harvest, good returns and for some it brings death, destruction and pain..
Mr. Buddy is lost in translation..his eyes fixed on the circles, the innumerable circles that these drops make when they hit the earth..
A moment manages to stay fixed for quite some time...a lot more than other things in Buddy's life..
The first drop falls on his eyes, the next on his forehead and in a few more seconds, Buddy is drenched in water,..
This time the rain drops are taking a lil more time to reach the earth...
and as these rain drops traverse his face from the forehead to his chin, the rain drops take along with them a few more drops, that go unnoticed in the eyes of eveyone, all excpet Mr. Buddy and the rain!!!
Sunday, January 6, 2008
APPU BABY!!!! Things will be all right….
“Appu…love you so much,,,its nice to see you so strong and level headed.
It is still so difficult to digest the fact that Aparna Das is clear about what she wants from life..what she expects and what her priorities are..”
A cup of coffee and some toast…Two stupid people and Pune’s MG road.
9 AM
CCD >>>> George>>>>Barista
She treated me everywhere that day…J
Hey girl. It just a matter of few more years ..a lil more stuggles…and a lil more tears..
But hang on..things will be great and things will be right..
Don’t give up on what you believe in…that’s the most important thing…don’t lose faith,,,everything else will just pass by..
Don’t wanna preach to a lawyer..:P
And hey….You have started looking really beautiful…I know it’s a lil too late..but so what…atleast I am sure you don’t get these kinda complimets from anywhere else…
It is still so difficult to digest the fact that Aparna Das is clear about what she wants from life..what she expects and what her priorities are..”
A cup of coffee and some toast…Two stupid people and Pune’s MG road.
9 AM
CCD >>>> George>>>>Barista
She treated me everywhere that day…J
Hey girl. It just a matter of few more years ..a lil more stuggles…and a lil more tears..
But hang on..things will be great and things will be right..
Don’t give up on what you believe in…that’s the most important thing…don’t lose faith,,,everything else will just pass by..
Don’t wanna preach to a lawyer..:P
And hey….You have started looking really beautiful…I know it’s a lil too late..but so what…atleast I am sure you don’t get these kinda complimets from anywhere else…
She came, I saw and I fell in love….
A warm handshake… and not a hug. A simple hi, a formal how are you? And not the usual embrace..
It must have been sometime since I last saw her face… Won’t go on to write that it felt like eternity…coz it didn’t!!
Time is weird. Sometimes it just passes so quickly that you don’t even realize that a lot has happened. And sometimes it just refuses to move…
I asked myself…hey are you ok?
Something inside me said. Never felt better!!
I asked again…why are you so happy?
But this time there was no reply..hmm,,,maybe I should not force myself…and I simply tried and relaxed …totally oblivious to people and things around me..
During the next three or four days I realised… why I was happy..what made me so happy?
Call it filmy..call it exaggerating..
It was nice to see her happy…nice to know that she is doing good,,,nice to know that she is happy..nice to know that her family is doing great…nice to know that she is still in touch with her old friends…nice to know that eventhough Last one year has changed her a lot…but she is essentially the same girl that I fell in love with…(sometime back…a memory lost in history now..) ..nice to know that small lil things still get her all excited..nice to know that she is fighting for what she wants,,nice to know that she hasn’t lost her focus,,,nice to know so many more things…
And I fell in love,,,no no,,don’t get me wrong..i didn’t fall in love with her all again…I fell in love with that moment…A moment that I will cherish for a long time..I was proud..i was happy..i wanted to cry..,,,and then slowly I said to myself…
You played your part well…congrats..and quietly I got busy in the noise….
It must have been sometime since I last saw her face… Won’t go on to write that it felt like eternity…coz it didn’t!!
Time is weird. Sometimes it just passes so quickly that you don’t even realize that a lot has happened. And sometimes it just refuses to move…
I asked myself…hey are you ok?
Something inside me said. Never felt better!!
I asked again…why are you so happy?
But this time there was no reply..hmm,,,maybe I should not force myself…and I simply tried and relaxed …totally oblivious to people and things around me..
During the next three or four days I realised… why I was happy..what made me so happy?
Call it filmy..call it exaggerating..
It was nice to see her happy…nice to know that she is doing good,,,nice to know that she is happy..nice to know that her family is doing great…nice to know that she is still in touch with her old friends…nice to know that eventhough Last one year has changed her a lot…but she is essentially the same girl that I fell in love with…(sometime back…a memory lost in history now..) ..nice to know that small lil things still get her all excited..nice to know that she is fighting for what she wants,,nice to know that she hasn’t lost her focus,,,nice to know so many more things…
And I fell in love,,,no no,,don’t get me wrong..i didn’t fall in love with her all again…I fell in love with that moment…A moment that I will cherish for a long time..I was proud..i was happy..i wanted to cry..,,,and then slowly I said to myself…
You played your part well…congrats..and quietly I got busy in the noise….
Nostalgia hits me!!! Bang Bang Bang!!!!
I was standing in front of C.O.E.P bus stand. Scared to look at my own Alma mater. Swapnil was supposed to pick me up. He didn’t turn up. So I decided to go straight to my aunt’s place. It was nice and it felt good to walk in the lanes that led to my aunt’s place. The busy life of the lower middle class people always fascinates me. Totally ignorant to all the materialistic pleasures in the world. Happy with whatever they have and they can afford.
They were so happy to receive me. It sometime scares me when I realize that they think really high of me and don’t lose an opportunity to praise me. Nevertheless I enjoy it.
“When will you come to town, Bastard??” Anubhav enquired.
“No sooner than 8 PM” was my reply. And 8 it was when I met swapnil, anubhav and sahil.
Sipping over a coffee and burning a lil more inside..i called up joy..The place had already started to haunt me. It reminded me of many a people. Aparna, Joy, Sahil, Anubhav, Abhijeet and Tanvi.
Bhushan was missing from the scene as usual. Not that he does it intentionally. But then it is now a matter of fact that we have gone on to make sure that we really don’t expect anything from his side.
Crap!!! Don’t feel like writing anymore…feelings sleepy.
They were so happy to receive me. It sometime scares me when I realize that they think really high of me and don’t lose an opportunity to praise me. Nevertheless I enjoy it.
“When will you come to town, Bastard??” Anubhav enquired.
“No sooner than 8 PM” was my reply. And 8 it was when I met swapnil, anubhav and sahil.
Sipping over a coffee and burning a lil more inside..i called up joy..The place had already started to haunt me. It reminded me of many a people. Aparna, Joy, Sahil, Anubhav, Abhijeet and Tanvi.
Bhushan was missing from the scene as usual. Not that he does it intentionally. But then it is now a matter of fact that we have gone on to make sure that we really don’t expect anything from his side.
Crap!!! Don’t feel like writing anymore…feelings sleepy.
The Train
I know, it would remind you of one of these three things:
The Music band
The English movie(1964)
The Hindi Movie(2007)
Anyways, the title doesn’t have anything to do with the content.
It’s so weird. I usually (almost all the time) travel all alone. And I usually travel the most in my circle of friends. The long journey give’s me ample amount of time to sit back, close my eyes and think ….think,,,and think a lot!!!
Excited---to meet mom n dad!
Excited---to meet di, jiju n varun!!
Mixed feelings---to meet old pals. Talked to joy and anamitra regarding this when sahil, joy, anmaitra and me had no roof on top of our heads in pune one day or rather night.
Sad---to go to Pune gain. I think it should be scared and not sad.
11 PM
The train was running three hours late. Reached home at 12. Mom had made south Indian food.
1 AM
My stomach felt good. The food had made me happy. I closed my eyes. Still thinking and wondering about ….Drat!!! I should stop thinking…I bloody think a lot!!
“Good Night” I said to myself.
The Music band
The English movie(1964)
The Hindi Movie(2007)
Anyways, the title doesn’t have anything to do with the content.
It’s so weird. I usually (almost all the time) travel all alone. And I usually travel the most in my circle of friends. The long journey give’s me ample amount of time to sit back, close my eyes and think ….think,,,and think a lot!!!
Excited---to meet mom n dad!
Excited---to meet di, jiju n varun!!
Mixed feelings---to meet old pals. Talked to joy and anamitra regarding this when sahil, joy, anmaitra and me had no roof on top of our heads in pune one day or rather night.
Sad---to go to Pune gain. I think it should be scared and not sad.
11 PM
The train was running three hours late. Reached home at 12. Mom had made south Indian food.
1 AM
My stomach felt good. The food had made me happy. I closed my eyes. Still thinking and wondering about ….Drat!!! I should stop thinking…I bloody think a lot!!
“Good Night” I said to myself.
Indecisiveness
Some time in December
Mails kept pouring in..my inbox was full..
Calls kept coming.. my battery was almost dead.
SMS continued..my fingers had started aching..
And yet I was not sure whether I could make it to pune on 28th December.
Almost One week later!!
Friday 21, 2007
Friday night..group party..free booze, (humans drink booze like water, especially when u get it for free..sad, but true) , and dance!! I hate dancing. I love to dance when I am all alone, when no one can point fingers at me and laugh over my steps or the expressions on my face. Its ok!! I am not a great dancer and I feel it’s not such a big deal that people have to make it such a big issue. So I was enjoying my drink and music and the company of my friends.
1.30 AM
Should head back to home. I have to catch a train to Hyderabad tomorrow. Leaving early didn’t help though. Somehow just cannot manage to sleep before 3 or 4 AM. Thanks to a certain stage of my life!!
9 AM – Next day
The guy from Karvy had come. I had to wrap up my investments for the year to save myself from the taxes.
The talk continued till 1 PM.
Had booked a cab. Saumil came along.
5 PM
The train left. The indecisiveness had vanished. Yes!! I was on my way. Still wondering how things would unfold for me in the coming few days. Had loads of stuff on my mind related to family, friends, and money and of course….MYSELF!!!
Mails kept pouring in..my inbox was full..
Calls kept coming.. my battery was almost dead.
SMS continued..my fingers had started aching..
And yet I was not sure whether I could make it to pune on 28th December.
Almost One week later!!
Friday 21, 2007
Friday night..group party..free booze, (humans drink booze like water, especially when u get it for free..sad, but true) , and dance!! I hate dancing. I love to dance when I am all alone, when no one can point fingers at me and laugh over my steps or the expressions on my face. Its ok!! I am not a great dancer and I feel it’s not such a big deal that people have to make it such a big issue. So I was enjoying my drink and music and the company of my friends.
1.30 AM
Should head back to home. I have to catch a train to Hyderabad tomorrow. Leaving early didn’t help though. Somehow just cannot manage to sleep before 3 or 4 AM. Thanks to a certain stage of my life!!
9 AM – Next day
The guy from Karvy had come. I had to wrap up my investments for the year to save myself from the taxes.
The talk continued till 1 PM.
Had booked a cab. Saumil came along.
5 PM
The train left. The indecisiveness had vanished. Yes!! I was on my way. Still wondering how things would unfold for me in the coming few days. Had loads of stuff on my mind related to family, friends, and money and of course….MYSELF!!!
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