ATTJ – 2009 – Part 1

Round about this time, last year, I had written about my travelling experience to Jabalpur (ATTJ).

The reason for my trip to Jabalpur last year was Saumil’s engagement . The reason this time was Marriage.

Time flies by faster when you want things to slow down a little. Everything seems to be on the fast track. Everything except the train I boarded to reach Jabalpur. I personally feel that the Indian railways should rename the train from Sanghamitra express to BharatDarshan Passenger.

9 AM – Thursday Morning . A Marwadi, a Jain, a Kannadiga and 4 Biharis. Well who could ask for more. That reminds me about the new Murphy’s law. All beautiful girls (can be read as just girls also) will always be seated everywhere except where I am seated (boogie, compartment, blah blah) in a train.

I was dead tired from my last day’s work and had to catch up on a LOT of sleep. Maybe I should bond with the fellow passengers later, I thought. And hoping that dreams would surely treat me better than real life, I slowly relaxed myself.

4 PM – WTH !!! “Bangalore se Patna jane wali, 2295 Sanghamitra express thodi he der mein platform number 7 se ravana hone ke liye taiyar hai” (for those who are wondering why my Hindi Sucks – It’s just a n exact repeat of what I heard). Rubbing my eyes, I get down on the platform and receive my first shock.

CHENNAI !!! Yes the holy, mother of all, suckmitra express was in Chennai !! Yes, from Bangalore to Patna via Chennai !!!

I spent half the day in a train only to reach Chennai !! With a depressed sigh, I ate my lunch. The Marwari guy was the first to break the ice.

With a stupid and irritating smile on his face he asked me “Kya karte hai aap?” – I wanted to avoid him, and thought of coming up with something fancy like “baap ke paas bahut paisa hai, isliye bas bharat dekhne nikal pada, ya chori karta tha, abhi abhi jail se choot kar aa raha hun!!

Engineer aur pseudo lawyer hun !! – came the reply.

Engineer aur lawyer, kaafi padai ki hai, to shaadi ho gayi aapki? He asked !!

“kyun aapki beti ko koi rishta nahi mil raha kya? Was what I wanted to say, but by now his stupid smile was not that irritating after all… so I said, haan, 2 bacche bhi hain !!

Kya baat hai !! kaafi young dikhte hai aap !! he said..

Realizing that this wasn’t going to really help, all I said “Thank you” hoping that this would be the last of this conversation.

Aapki biwi aur bache nahi aaye !! he said.

“aah !! this guy won’t give up, I thought” nahi who…and I picked my phone pretending that someone was calling me.

The next stop was Vijaywada . I called up home !! they were expecting that I must have crossed daund, and would be another 6 to 7 hours from Nagpur !!

Mom was as usual comforting and told me to relax when I told her the story. The train was already running 2 hours late (something to do with trains that start or end in UP or Bihar)

In order to avoid any more silly conversations, I opened the new book, 2 States by ChetanBhagat and started reading it.

Kuch khayenge aap? Meri biwi ne ghar se kaafi kuch bheja hai khaane ke liye – said the marwadi guy.

Ji Nahi, shukriya – I said.

A lot of more interesting things happened when the biharis and the Jain guy also got involved. (but I shall leave that part for another entry). (the kannadiga couldn’t really figure out that I was also a kanadiga !! thanks to my hindi, the long kurta and the kada in my hand.)

Next day, and by 10 AM, 2 States was over. I wonder why he is a bestseller in India. Anyways, that itself is a completely different topic and we shall rest the 2 states case here itself.

The train had crossed Nagpur, and I was feeling hungry !! My stomach had slowly started making weird and funny noises !!

Aap kuch khate ya peete nahi hai kya, the marwadi guy said.

Oh no, not again!!!- I thought !!,

Yeh lejiye, try kariye, bahut badiya hai !! I was too tired to fight back. Besides, the food wasn’t that bad. Infact his wife was a pretty good cook !!

By 12, the Jain and the Marwari had bonded really well. It’s amazing how totally random and strange people in India can unite over so many matters. In politics, from Lalu Prasad, statue’s of Mayawati to Loss of BJP in the recent elections, to religion, detest for Islam, and the spoilt youth of today, the mini skirts, the tight pants, and the live-in relationships.

I found myself being dragged in every conversation. I was getting tired, so started reading catch 22. What an irong I thought !!

Itarsi at 4 PM and Jabalpur at 6.45. In between, there were many a fights between the Ticket checker and the passengers. I kind of felt bad for the TT. He was a tam, and the passengers who were arguing with him were biharis, bhopali’s and allahabadi’s. Neither party could understand what the other party was saying. In the end, the general class ticket holders managed to stay put in the reservation compartment. By the time, Jabalpur came; a single berth was occupied by around 5 to 6 people.

What’s the point of even getting a reservation done ? I thought !!

The journey had been tiring – physically and mentally !! I prayed for better things to follow !!!

They did, and they did in the most amazing manner. If I could rewind the entire journey, I would probably, tag that image of mine when I got down from the train and stepped outside the station – The prey !!!

Don't know where to go ?

listening to your heart" OR "following your heart".

Things would be clear...they should be...

Maybe they won't..you want to commit and then you want to hold yourself back..

Hidden joy or continuous state of trance...till when...and why not?

Four ways to go and one way to choose...can't i just stay put....and then so little time..

Being extreme, being romantic romantic, being just normal...

Variance

It’s been almost a week. Still no clue about the anonymous person who sent me the flowers. As perplexed today as i was yesterday.

The flowers are still lying on my desk. Fresh flowers a week back! Potpourri today!

A vibrant moment found its place in mundane affairs.

Thank You!

Venting Dreams

No affirmations, no abandonment, not much of thinking at all.

Get up, brush your teeth, take a bath, go to office, do your work, hang out with friends if you feel like, listen to music, eat a lot, stare at the phone ringing, chew gum, watch some movies, learn some coding, read maximum city, call up home, sleep, wake up, body ache and venting dreams.

The daemons of the past have been long gone. There is no corner in my mind or my heart for them. 

Not even reminiscing of a subconscious mind.

 And day by day, these venting dreams keep pulling me back. 

Free as a bird in these venting dreams, only to realize when you wake up that your wings have been tied and your flight is short. 

 A desire to gain freedom from inhibitions, responsibilities, worries, memories, control, expectations and forbiddance. 

Two steps at a time I move ahead and one step at a time I am pulled back.

“Dream”

Well, I know I it was supposed to be a Tiffin Centre. Yes, I also remember each slap-up support and words of encouragements bestowed on me. So, I was wondering if any of you (esp: Sita, Saumil, Ritika, including others) would be “equally” interested in tagging along for a new plan. Please look at the picture to let me know your views. P.S: Now if you guys are wondering whether I would also be wearing a “Lungi” and lifting it all the way up, doing the Appadi Poda dance, while wearing the black local made ray-ban that can be brought from the national market, shouting “enna rascala” and “dischkiyon dischkiyon”, all the time making it a point that my South Indian accent makes me look EVEN more stupid, I must say, you are in for a big treat. I can probably endorse the veerapan style moustache (I did try the moustache for two weeks. I received a mixed bag of response, so let me know if I should be putting it up on the blogger), slurp and burp while eating, and use “Aiyo”, “macha”, “Chuma” and “wassup da” in every sentence that comes out from my mouth. Well, the opportunities are unlimited and there is no dearth of creativity. Maybe someday we can open up a few branches in Goa too. Till then, let me wonder how the picture would look if it read: Anant Wines” [And for all you “northies” who must have had fun or enjoyed the remarks against “us” southies” I will put up a board so that your kith and klan can understand what we serve: “We serve “Child Beer” and “Chilled Bear”].

Part iii

Part ii

Part i

Interim Report - Synopsis

The report was pending for more than one year now. I have to pull up my socks; else I will surely find myself in a soup, answerable to a LOT of people.
So these are the findings of the study. A psychopath’s guidebook for understanding the psychopaths. (Please note that this is the Interim Report. The findings of the study and the conclusion will be provided in the Final Deliverable)

Rambo - Light Another Day !!

And slowly he moves through the hall, almost blinded by the darkness around him.

Dyer Maker playing in the background. (Oh, did I tell ya that I love this song? It will go into my list of all time favorite romantic songs). Well, I shall provide you the lyrics of the same over here. (Click to follow link). Now I did sing “Believe in love” for a girl once over a call, and considering that it was crazy and funny at the same time, I have decided that some lucky lady (make it UNLUCKY - the one who shall commit the mistake of falling in love with me) will be at the receiving end of a scintillating dance performance and a splendid karaoke from “yours truly – signed Anant Puranik, over an awing sunset, some exotic Mexican red wine, and yes, a nice candle light dinner.

Candles??

Yes, and slowly he moved from wall to wall. He had to find the candles.
He remembered he had kept them in the shelf. He searched in vain only to find an ash tray, few pencils and pen, body deodorant, and a marker. The marker almost managed to fool him. His cry of joy faded even before the cry could reach his own ears. Damn!! Never ever clean your house. Especially if you are the kind of person who can spot a Zippo in a heap of clothes or find some or little joy in a mess of Blues, but cannot remember where your mobile or your wallet is when you finish cleaning your very own house.

So he put on his lacerated combat uniform, the night vision gog-gles that he recently bought from subhiksha, his leather boots from red tape that old pals in Delhi had gifted him for his birthday, and black mascara on his face, that would send chills down even Arnold's spine (courtesy – Roomie’s GF AKA Wife). The Rambo was ready. Another endeavor to defy the darkness – The mission was very important and highly classified.

“Like a Stone”

No, he was not “like a stone”. That was the new track playing now by Audioslave. Thought you people would be interested in the playlist too. And yes, I am not going to keep pasting the hyperlink for each song that I mention. Google it yourself!! Yes, it’s an awesome song. That much I can promise.

Beep!! Beep!!

“Be there in 15 minutes. And you better not get late”

Ok!! The message hit Rambo’s head as if he had woken up to find himself in the enemy territory, constantly getting bombarded and hit by enemy firing and shelling. Will Rambo live to see another day? Will he be lucky to enjoy a nice dinner?

And now it’s time for some commercials. :)

Shopkeeper: Oh ho Anant ji , aaiye aaiye.Kaun si wine lena pasand karenge.Ye dekhiye ye..(Someother wine which is not Sula)

Anant: Nahi Nahi ye nahi woh(pointing at Sula)

Shopkeeper: Par aap to woh, purani mehengi wali wine.... (Stammering)

Anant: Leta tha, par jab baat dinner se aage hi na bade, to koi mehengi wali wine kyun le, ye(sula) na le!

Shopkeeper: Man gaye!!

Anant: Kise?

Shopkeeper: Aapki par ki nazar aur sula super, dono ko !!!

Song time:
Sasti sula super,
Sasti sula super,
Mehengi wali kick, sasti sula super se aaye,
Sasti sula super se paise bhi bach bach jaye
Sabki pasand sula super !!

And we are back!!

"sound playing in the background as wee have a flashback )Ab tak aapne dekha kaise hamara Rambo is khatarnak mission par bekhauf chala ja raha hai, ab aage :

And all of a sudden like a bolt of lightning, Our Rambo recollects that he had kept the candles near the shoe rack. End of story

Don’t you guys love happy endings? I do :)

Oh yes, by the way, ever heard of a “Candle Light Bath”? Well if you haven't, ask Rambo.

Make sure you tune in again, same day, same time to see how our Rambo travels to unknown territories for dinner. Till then, Keep smiling and Godspeed.

(Babe I’m Gonna leave ya by the greatest rock band of all times, Led Zeppelin is the next track if you are interested in knowing)

Questions and Answers

Now at a certain stage of your life (make that my life, I don’t want to generalize things here), certain sequence of events occur. Events that leave you look stupid, dumb, happy, hurt, confused, and awkward and in a totally anti-climax way (somewhat taking inspiration from Ghajni – where the whole movie was an anti-climax), leave you pondering over the question that “why do I not ask questions anymore?"

A stage where nothing looks anomalous, even in the “least significant bit” prospect. The outlook towards everything is a bootless task. Probably, it has a lot to do with things getting mundane too.

And probably, it’s because, no amount of explanation and logic and “if’s” and “buts’” even remotely bespeak or solve the hotchpotch that is slowly but alarmingly multiplying in the mind.

Everything looks pre-planned. Propaganda to make sure that every beautiful thought gets mowed down. Only in my case, it’s the thoughts that are left mutilated and snapped and obviously, killed.

So if the following lines “I practice every day to find some clever lines to say, To make the meaning come through, But then I think I'll wait until the evening, gets late And I'm alone with you, The time is right, Your perfume fills my head, The stars get red, And oh the night's so blue, And then I go and spoil it all, By saying something stupid, Like I love you ” of the song “Something stupid” by Frank Sinatra keeps playing over and over in my mind as if the propaganda was to make sure that in the entire record, only these lines were recorded and somehow, the fast forward, stop and eject buttons were disabled, I shouldn’t be surprised and surely not look shocked. Well, after all, it’s just a song. A stupid song!!

It’s stupid; because the world labels it stupid (I am not talking about the song here!!). It’s dumb because I have never made sense (this blog entry stands as a deterrent example. It’s happy, because in spite of what I may write and what I am supposed to do, I end up defying all the logics and what people call as “sensible”. It makes me happy because, I feel it is the only way I can reciprocate to the plans of destiny that has been written down for me. It hurts because, it’s futile. It is like I have been asked to find a corner in a circular room. I could have used the term “finding needle in a hay stack”, but considering how tenacious I am, I may end up finding the needle. Stubbornness runs in my blood. It is confusing, because I always end up asking myself the same question when I find myself on the start line again after running a marathon “Is it really worth it?”. It’s confusing because, I feel that I am so stoned to realize that I have been running the same race again and again and everybody else has already left the stadium. It’s awkward, because if I was the only one who was enduring these feelings, things would have stopped looking stupid, people would have stopped labeling it dumb, it wouldn’t look confusing anymore. And, I cannot really use the “happy” aspect over here to complete the flow.

“To do or not to do” and “who cares even if I do or I don’t do” are the songs that I have recently composed. One follows the other, making sure that the chronology is observed.

Maybe someday, I will publish them. Maybe I will become rich. Maybe I will do things that are not pre-planned. Maybe there won’t be any propaganda anymore.
The wind, the night, the drive, and me in that picture in a corner somewhere. Who knows, there maybe you in that picture too. (relax!!)

So here is the irony: “Why don’t I ask questions anymore?”